A Sneak Preview of My Novel In Progress
Daddy’s Girl. A psychological thriller set in Finnish Lapland. For your reading pleasure, I give you the opening scene:
The frozen air hit her as the door swung open. Her body instinctively drew itself into a tighter foetal position. Her ears roared. The pain of moving tore at her tenuous grasp on consciousness, her field of vision narrowing to the 10 square centimeters of grey, lint-flecked nylon directly in front of her face: the musty lining of his car boot.
Grabbed by the collar of her coat, she was dragged out and over the lip. Head first, she slithered over the edge like an inebriated snake, hitting the ground in one fluid movement. The thick snow broke her fall and still it felt as though each of her bones imploded on impact. She lay face down in the snow, brain numb. Over the top of the pain fell a blanket of cold. Breath stealing, skin searing cold. Flames of ice that sliced through her skin. A whole other layer of agony.
She couldn’t move. Couldn’t even make a noise. She didn’t know if that was fear, the pain, or if her body had simply stopped working. It didn’t mater. It would be over soon.
He kicked her over onto her back, grunting with the effort. Snowflakes landed softly on her swollen face. The weak light of the late afternoon barely made itself noticed under her fluttering eyelashes as she fought to stay conscious. The pain helped. So did the cold. Although they were fast becoming one and the same. They gave her something to hold onto. She wanted to be awake when it happened. When he finally killed her.
A hand grabbed her under each armpit and she was hauled, head lolling, feet making ruts through the thick snow. Her mangled body was pulled onto the rough, wooden boards of their sled and then dropped. The light behind her eyelids exploded into a million slivers of silver edged glass, each one embedding itself into her skull.
Footsteps crunched through heavy snow, the sound loud and crude over the rolling white noise in her head. Her body lurched as the sled began to move. Pulled deeper into the Finnish forest, the repetitive canopy of pine-tree branches overhead lulled her into the dark, murky depths of unconsciousness.
Several times she came back around, the noises always the same; crunching footsteps, the loud hissing noise of the sled through snow. Each time she woke she was covered in a deeper layer of snow. She quickly lost all feeling in her hands and feet and when the numbness spread up her arms and legs a grateful tear slid down her cheek.
Something was different. She lay, paralysed, trying to figure it out. Her head ached, the white noise was so loud it made her ears hurt. The noise. It had stopped. They weren’t moving.
The sled tilted. Surprised, she tipped into the snow. Was this it? The end? She could hear heavy breathing and the sound of a match being struck. The smell of cigarette smoke drifted through the still air. He’s smoking again. He hadn’t done that since before… Her mind shut down. Even now it wouldn’t let her think about then.
He stood close to her head, his black boot inches from her face. She braced herself for it, welcomed it. The end. Freedom.
“Such a waste. Why did you have to turn out to be such a bad girl?” he said in a low murmur, crouching beside her and stroking her hair with his gloved hand. “But, what’s done is done.” He sighed and straightened up. “I’ll leave you both here for when the bears wake up. No-one will find you before they do.”
He flicked the dog-end into the snow. It burnt bright next to her face for a moment before going out with a hiss. A last kick to the stomach and his footsteps retreated, the sled making less noise now as it slid easily behind him and disappeared behind the wall of falling snow.
I'm Heather, an ex expat, now back in blighty and living in Lancashire. Which is just like Lapland... only less snowy and stuff.
This is good stuff Heather, I want to read the rest. No need for ransomed cute puppies to get a vote on this one, it’s going to be great! how long until you get published???? you must be feeling proud of yourself and so you should.
Bettyx
Betty, thank you. I haven’t finished it yet, although am working furiously on it. Hence the lack of blogging lately. And when it’s finished I need to start looking for an agent etc so I guess it’s quite a long time from being published.
Wow. That really grabs the reader by the scruff of the neck and gives them a damn good shaking. That’s a big hook for such a little scene, Heather. I’m looking forward to reading more.
Thank you dear, that was the plan
Want. More. Now. Need to know who ‘both’ are….
Thank you, that’s the reaction I was hoping for. I shall keep writing…it’s not finished yet.
Brilliant! Though my stomach turned as I read. I definitely want to read more and am also left wondering about ‘both’. I am left willing her to find some strength to live and someone to miraculously save her from the brink of death. Could she be pregnant? So many questions! Look forward to more!
hi Sarah, thank you!This is the reaction I was hoping it would have
So I’ll send you some money now and you’ll give us the rest of the book.. yes..please.. Loved it!
BNM
sure…just as soon as i’ve finished writing it…
You, my dear, are brilliant.
Brilliant.
I’m loving this new beginning.
Thank you darling. It’s a bit more grabbing than the last, isn’t it?
I need more!!
Soon, soon. It’s not finished yet
Excellent! More please….
Thank you! I’m working on it
Ooooooooh, I love this new start!
Thank you lovely. Me too
Strong stuff…love the way it is now a tense snow bound thriller!
Thank you Emma
To be honest, I read ‘A psychological thriller set in Finnish Lapland’ and then scrolled right down to the comment. I am just such a wuss when it comes to scary stuff, I can’t get myself to read it. I used to hide behind the sofa when my parents put on a thriller on tv, and the glimpses I got through the thick, fluffy cushions was enough to make me have nightmare for years on end. I still hate shower curtains…!!
How do you write thrillers without shitting your pants?!?!?!
So. On a more helpful note: I love your writing. And I am sure you are going to pop out something great. Keep up the good work. Judging by your commentators, it’s awesome.
Deborah xx
You big wuss, you. lol.
Wow – I cant wait for the next installment. Great writing Heather. The opening scenes are perfect.
Thanks Naomi, Glad you enjoyed it
I’m with Steve – it grabs the reader by the scruff of the neck and doesn’t let go! If you can maintain this caliber of writing (recognizing that of course it won’t always be quite so action-packed), you are on your way. Well done. More please!
thank you Linda!
Really intrigueing, Heather. Well done. Please let us know as soon as you finish it. Love thrillers set in Scandinavia. Ciao. A.
I will do, promise. I shall keep you all posted.
Absolutely brilliant – I love it. Definitely wouldn’t be able to stop reading it and you’ve thrown out so many different hooks I’m longing to know what happens.
I absolutely love the title too.
Thank you! So pleased you enjoyed it!
After reading all of that praise, I have an overwhelming urge to tell you it’s cr*p
But get writing, you can’t just leave us hanging…. it’s good stuff.
*snigger*
Thank you! I shall have to get on and finish it now, eh?
Not normally a lover of thrillers, i like the easy reading escapism of “chick lit” but this has left me wanting to read more, well done you.x
Thank you Linda, it’s great to know it captured your imagination
I read your opening chapter a few days ago via a random link. It is still in my head and I am wishing I had the complete book in my hands so I could finish reading it. You will let us know when it’s published, won’t you
Thank you Michael, that’s great to hear. I’m so thrilled it is staying with people. I haven’t finished it yet but when (she says crossing her fingers and hoping that someone will publish it) it is being published I will certainly let you know!
Not sure why I haven’t seen this before hun, but really enjoyed reading it this afternoon. The scene doesn’t just read, it explodes in your imagination like a firework. Keep going until it’s finished, it will be worth it. You’ve already got a readership eagerly awaiting its completion! Vxx
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